Holy Orders by Angus McLean

Author:Angus McLean [McLean, Angus]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2018-12-27T22:00:00+00:00

Nine

Mike’s face was normally sharp, even hatchet-like, but this morning it looked like he’d sucked a lemon. The biggest, most bitter lemon he could find on a Saturday morning.

‘Unbelievable,’ he said at last, shaking his head at me. He leaned forward in his desk chair, elbows on his knees. He was the apex of a triangle between the three of us in the office. ‘So you almost get run over, end up riding on the roof of the bad guys’ car until they throw you off then try to run you over again.’

He pointed a scarred finger towards Molly, sitting at her own desk. ‘You jump a dude with a baseball bat and kick him in the crackers, knock him out with his own bat, then throw rocks at the bad guys trying to run this turkey down’ – he jerked a thumb in my direction – ‘then the two of you take out the second guy with a baseball bat and make your escape.’ He looked from Molly to me. ‘Is that about it?’

I tried to shrug nonchalantly but the coolness was diminished by a painful tug in my shoulder. My head was throbbing. I had a decent lump on my hip where a stray rock had collected me. In the interests of preserving our marriage, Molly and I had agreed not to discuss that any further. I had told her that we didn’t want to hit a rocky patch. She had told me I was an idiot, but she was sorry despite that.

‘More or less,’ Molly said.

Mike shook his head and ran a hand through his short hair. ‘Unbelievable,’ he repeated.

‘It doesn’t surprise me,’ came a new voice from the doorway.

A voice I loathed from a man I despised. Hugh Kennedy pushed the door all the way open, letting it bang against the wall as he stepped in. He stooped with his hands on his hips, his weasel face moving from one to the other of us.

‘Oh thank the Lord,’ I said, ‘Inspector Clouseau’s arrived.’

Kennedy fixed me with a penetrating glare. I tried hard to stay resolute.

‘You’ve got some explaining to do, Crowley.’

‘I know,’ I said, getting to my feet, ‘I really do, don’t I?’

‘You’re damn right you do.’

I cocked my head at him. ‘I just said that.’ I turned my attention to Mike. ‘Mate, that last Corona someone took from the fridge the other day?’ I let out a heavy breath and shook my head in shame. ‘It was me. I’m sorry.’

Kennedy started to speak but I held up a hand for silence, shushing him. ‘Please, Hugh. I need to get this off my chest.’ I turned to Molly. ‘And when you left me to do the washing yesterday, Mol? And you thought I’d done your whites on a cold wash, not a warm wash? And I said I hadn’t?’ I rubbed a hand over my face and stared at the floor. ‘I lied. I did it on a cold wash.’

Molly looked hurt. ‘I’m so disappointed in you, Dan.

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